The Meh, the Weird and the Fabulous: It’s The Grammys (What Else?)

Last night the Grammys were –as expected- not only an ode to music, but also a celebration of weird and wonderful fashion. Some outfits were –yamn!- booorrrinnnngg, others were completely bonkers and –thank God!- some were absolutely, breathtakingly beautiful.

So without further ado, I present to you the Meh, the Weird and the Fabulous!

The Meh:

Miley Cyrus shows some skin… again…

Nicky Minaj… shows off her curves…and boobs… once more…

Nothing we haven’t seen before.

Although I absolutely adore Beyoncé and her sense of style, her choice of dresses has been rather predictable lately.

Black. Sheer. Lace. No matter how gorgeous this combo is, when you wear it all the freakin’ time, it can get quite dull, Queen Bey!

The Weird:

Madonna in Givenchy, also known as “This Is What Horror Looks Like”

I can’t quite put my finger on it, but something just seems off with Katy Perry’s dress…

Or maybe it’s just her purple hair that is making me hallucinate. Both are possible.

Lady Gaga:

Yikes.

The Fabulous:

Gwen Stefani looks fierce and foxy in Versace

Another Versace lover: Ariana Grande finally embraces her inner glamour queen and let go of the slutty teenager look. I wonder how long this is going to last though?

Taylor Swift demonstrates once again that you really can’t go wrong with Elie Saab. And I luvvv how she colour blocked her shoes with her dress. Go Taylor!

Iggy Azalea is elegant yet incredibly sexy in Armani Prive

Rita Ora shines –both literally and figuratively- on the Grammy red carpet in this stunning Prada sparkling silver gown. Gimme Gimme!

Normally, Rihanna doesn’t shy away from skin-showing, daring, provocative outfits, but let me tell you: this new, pink and puffy version of Rihanna is a true revelation!

I never thought the following words would ever pass my lips: I like what Kim Kardashian is wearing.

Boom.

Surely, this must mark the end of the world?

Or maybe my approval of her dress has nothing to do with Mrs. West, but everything with the gorgeous design of Jean Paul Gaultier? Yes, it’s probably the latter. Everyone – even the skankiest skank (no offence, Kim)- would look classy in Gaultier.

Phew. Thank God that’s been cleared.

And here we have Jane Fonda in Balmain.

One word: WOW.

Let’s not forget that there were some fabulous men at the Grammy’s at well! Not a lot, I have to confess (most of them wore boring suits or weird gangsta outfits), but a couple of our favourite dudes opted for more class. For example the ever so cool Aloe Blacc.

7 not so traditional ways to prepare yourself for Christmas

Now that we have had Halloween and Thanksgiving, we can start to look forward to the most festive of holidays: Christmas

There are plenty of ways to prepare yourself for Christmas – like buying presents, decorating your house and listening to Mariah Carey’s notorious earworm- but I decided to look past the clichés (well, sort of anyway) and give you a list of all the other not so traditional ways to get ready for the Holidays.

• Dance around the house in your PJ’s

I’m not sure why this reminds of Christmas, actually. Maybe it’s the PJ’s. Maybe it’s the dancing. Maybe it’s both. I just know that if you spend half an hour dancing like a complete and utter doofus, suddenly the entire Christmas season will not seem so crazy after all.

Plus: it is just so much fun! You should try it, dear readers

.

• Drink hot chocolate, red wine and eggnog

Maybe it is not advisable to drink all of the above at once– because throwing up in a bucket is anything but a great way to kick off the X-mas season – but if you want to, I’m not going to stop you. Just Let me know how it turns out.

• Light your house with a thousand candles

Okay, so maybe this is one of those Christmas clichés, but there is simply no getting around it. Because everything starts with candles! It creates warmth, encourages love and friendship and if you opt for the scented version your house will smell heavenly too.

• Watch this video of a cute dog wearing a teddy bear costume and running on a treadmill

Yes, you’ve read that correctly. A dog. Dressed as a teddy bear. Doing a workout. On a treadmill.

Why would I want to watch it, you ask? Well, cuz it’s darn awesome! But also because watching this video has a very therapeutic effect on body and soul.

First of all, try watching this without starting to oooh and aaaah because of the dog’s insane cuteness. Seriously, watching this has suddenly made me want to throw a pre-Christmas My Little Pony-themed slumber party.

I wish I were joking, but I’m not.

Secondly, this cute dog might actually inspire you to wear an animal costume as well. Just for fun. (Admit it! I know you want to!)

And finally, this dog will make you feel so f***ing lazy –because you’re watching this from behind your laptop whilst wearing sweatpants and eating Ben & Jerry’s ice-cream – which will hopefully encourage you to hit the gym more often to prevent having to buy gigantic holiday pants.

• Do Burpees

This one is closely linked to the previous item on the list. If you want to avoid those holiday love handles, you have to start now! So come on, do those burpees! Yes, I’m aware that they are absolutely awful. They are absolutely terrifying. But will they have an effect? Absofuckinglutely.

• Listen to Frank Sinatra

Since it is not even December yet, some people may consider it to be a bit early to start listening to Wham or Ricky Martin Christmas songs. Not to mention singing along to Christmas carols! That is why I suggest you start getting into a Christmas mood by listening to dear oll’ Frank. Mister Sinatra is able to recreate that lovely, cozy Christmassy atmosphere without actually having to use words such as “Christmas tree” or “Santa”.

• Make soup

Although there is no direct correlation between soup and Christmas, stirring in a large pot of soup makes me feel all fuzzy and warm inside, just like Christmas does. These past couple of weeks I’ve gone all out on the soup front. I’ve made some exotic Garam masala and coconut pumpkin soup with peanut butter. I’ve made Russian beetroot soup with pink peppercorns and vodka (yessss) and yesterday, I conjured up some insane turnip and saffron soup with harrissa roasted pecans.

…

Sigh.

Needless to say that I couldn’t be in a better mood. A soupy state of mind truly is the best way to roll into the Christmas season.

So these are my seven weird ways to get into a Christmas spirit. What are yours?

Having a Bad Day? Listen To This Song And You’ll Feel So Much Better!

Dedicated readers of this blog will probably know by now that I’m a true admirer of the God-like über man that is Bruno Mars (Correction: dedicated followers will probably be sick already of all my Bruno adoration!). Although my inner Bruno-fan has been hibernating for these past few months, I think it is about time to unleash that crazy fan once more.

Why?

Because my imaginary lover has just released his collaboration with the brilliant Mark Ronson.

“Uptown Funk” is without a doubt the best song you will have heard in months – nay – years! It’s funky, it’s groovy and with sassy, albeit not particularly deep, lyrics like “uptown funk gon’ give it to ya” and “gotta kiss myself, so pretty” these two wonder boys truly make my ovaries tingle.

Even if you’re not a Bruno or Ronson fan, this song has everything (ev-er-y-thing!) to bring a smile to your face. A smile so ridiculously large, people might start to wonder whether something is wrong with you. (At least that was how people were looking at me when I was grocery shopping a couple of hours ago.)

Seriously, dear readers. If this song doesn’t become a huge/massive/ record-breaking hit, I’m honestly going to move to another planet.Interstellar-style.

Fo realz.

These Are A Few of My Favourite Things: Ed Sheeran’s Multiply, Lupita’s Face and Chaotic Lingerie Sales

“Some things are better left unsaid.” It’s a phrase that is often used by wannabe philosophers, big-headed people managers and women obsessed with Adele songs. And although there is some truth to be found in this statement – hell, I definitely don’t want to get in a fight with Adele fans! – I honestly believe that in most cases, the entire notion of keeping quiet is utter bullshit.

Why would you ever want to keep quiet, when you have so many brilliant things to say? Right?

Right???

So in order to illustrate how therapeutic it can be to say what is on your mind, here is a list of my favourite things that happened this week!

 

1)      Ed Sheeran’s X

I know I have said this plenty of times before, and I will keep repeating myself until everyone on this earth agrees with me, but I simply adore Ed Sheeran. He is the Man. He is my Man. And unless you’re an emotionless, grumpy guttersnipe, I really don’t understand why you wouldn’t want Ed to become your Man as well. His new album X, as in multiply, came out this week and it is –surprise!- a piece of heartfelt, genuine, musical poetry. He is able to multiply styles, genres and melodies like a true musical Einstein and shifts from acoustic ballads, to rhythmic, rocky tunes to edgy British rap. No matter what genre it is, each song sounds like a personal page from his own diary and I’m sure every listener will find a personal favourite among his wide variety of emotional songs. My personal favourites are I’m a Mess (Go figure, me too!), One (tissue!), Thinking Out Loud (more tissues!) and Take it Back (Singalong!)

Take it from me, this album will simply sweep you off your feet. In short, X does not just stand for Multiply, it also stands for Ed’s X factor.

 

2)      Lupita for Lancome

As you may already have heard, Lupita Nyong’o (yes, probably the most gorgeous woman on the planet) was named the new face of Lancome a couple of months ago, and now (finally!) the first picture of the campaign has arrived.

Be still my beating heart!

Needless to say, Lupita looks as flawless as can be. Even Beyoncé – the Queen of Flawlessness-  suddenly seems a wilted flower compared to Lupita’s beautiful face. Lupita personally shared the image on her Instagram page and called it “ the secret I never intended to keep”, since the images for the campaign were originally to become public as late as September. So thank God for Lupita.

Thank God for Lupita!

3)      Lingerie. What else?

You might have been wondering why I have been such an irregular blogger all of a sudden. Well, let me tell you a little secret: I am no longer part of the “young crowd”. I am no longer a university student. I am now officially a grown-up.

I have a job.

I.Have. A. Job.

A serious, adult, going-to-the-office, 9-to-5 job.

Needless to say, at first I was completely terrified (As in: “OMG, I have to pay taxes!”) and got home every night exhausted. Hence the lack of blog posts.

However, my job also has its benefits! I work for a lingerie company and today we all were invited to go to the company’s enormous lingerie sale. There was chaos everywhere: women throwing around bras and taking off their trousers in the middle of the hall, but it was by far the most awesome event of the week. I was so high on adrenaline, I thought I was going to bite someone! (Now  I know what that guy Suarez must have felt like…) I ended up buying two amazing lingerie sets, which are ridiculously expensive in store, but was able to buy for next to nothing! To avoid envious looks, I will not tell how much they actually cost or how much I paid for them, but let me just say this: Working for a lingerie company definitely has its perks!

PS: Is it weird to post pics of my newly bought lingerie, dear readers? I sincerely hope not. But if so, too bad, because with brilliant bras comes brilliant bragging!

Who Run the World? GIRLS!

This week is one full of girl power events. Yesterday there was the Chime For Change party, to celebrate last year’s charity gig that was set up to help empower women all over the world. At the same time as Beyoncé was playing hostess, across the Atlantic they were honoring the most glamourous women at the Glamour Women of the Year Awards.

In short, two events that proved that women are awesome! Let’s own it, ladies!

The Chime For Change party was hosted by Gucci Creative Director Frida Giannini, in order to reel in more money to promote education, justice and health for women (hell yeah!). Queen Bey, as a fashionable philanthropist, donated 500,000 dollars (blimey!) and her lil’ sis’ Solange did her thing on the turntables.

Unfortunately though, the entire purpose of the event got completely overshadowed by our desire to gossip, because it was Beyoncé and Solange’s first public appearance since  the infamous elevator incident at the Met Gala. Yessss, that incident.

Both fabulous ladies had plastered a flawless smile on their faces. Literally everyone was dying to know whether those smiles were genuine or fake. Why wasn’t Jay-Z there? Is she breaking up with Jay-Z? Is she temporarily moving in with Solange? Was the elevator incident just a publicity stunt in order to boost Solange’s popularity? So many questions, so few answers!

Gossip aside for a moment, Beyoncé looked stunning in that white jumpsuit.

Apparently both sisters thought it might put rumours to rest to opt for similar outfits, because both Beyoncé and Solange went for plunging cleavages.

Another attendee at the party was Black Lively. Just like Queen Bey and Solange, Blake opted for a daring cleavage but that sexy edge unfortunately isn’t enough to make us forget the downright ugly colour of the dress. I think it is supposed to be mustard yellow… or maybe mustard green?? Anyway,  after seeing that dress, there is only one place where I want to see that colour … on my plate, not on my clothes.

Meanwhile on the other side of the globe, her hubby Ryan Reynolds was present at the Glamour Women of the Year Awards, where he honored Dame Helen Mirren with the prestigious “Icon” award. His introduction was surprisingly good, in contrast to his actual acting (no offence, Ryan). Ryan wittily called her the Dame of Thrones ( thumbs up for the original word play!) and later added “someone we’re absolutely desperate to get drunk with at a party”. (I’ll raise a glass to that!)

However, even though these awards were all supposed to be about Glamour, there was hardly a frock in sight that I actually thought was beautiful. They were all ranging between “meh” and “get that ugly thing out of my sight”, so unfortunately my best dressed list is rather small.

No scratch that.

It is practically non-existent.

From all the women present at the event, there were only two (two!!!!) dresses I actually genuinely liked.

Let’s start with a bang: here is Paloma Faith in a stunning, dramatic see-through gown.

And then there was Alexa Chung, looking elegant in a simple Dior Couture dress.

That’s it.

All the other dresses/sacks/giant diapers are not worth mentioning.

Luckily for me, I could drown my fashion sorrow in handsome men, because the dresses may not have been memorable, the hot dudes attending the award show were. Phew!

David Gandy, as always, looks like a Greek God in a fabulous, expensive-looking suit. Seriously, do you know that brain freeze you get from eating ice-cream? Well, I get that every time I see our dearest David. He is simply too much deliciousness at once to digest.

Let’s not forget Mr. Blake Lively, Ryan Reynolds: dashing as always.

So I guess you could say that the most memorable thing about this women empowerment week were the handsome men.

 Oh, the irony.

Sing! Ed Sheeran’s Brand New Song Will Make Your Day

FACT: Ed Sheeran is a true virtuoso.

The British singer-songwriter (and our favourite redhead) dropped his highly anticipated song on BBC Radio One last night and -needless to say- I was going completely nutso!  (Okay, stupid rhyme. I’m just too excited)

The new track is called “SING” (very appropriate title),  for which he teams up with the one-and-only Pharrell (and his Hat). It is an invigorating up-tempo jam and it allows him to show off his impressive vocals and an even more impressive falsetto. It all sounded like sex to my ears:

“Feel it rush in through you from your head to toe.”

Oh, I’m feeling it, alright.

His new album “X” (as in “multiply”; Ed is really into math) will be released on June 23 and I seriously cannot wait to hear it blasting through my stereo!

In short, Ed Sheeran’s new song is the bomb!

No wait, scratch that. It is “the Mona Lisa of BOOM”! (Side note: All rights reserved to the insanely talented writers on Scandal. This was by far the best oneliner in the history of TV oneliners.)

So listen to it/ share it/ buy it/ download it/ preorder it

Whatever you do, just …

 

LOUDER!

The Best and Worst from the 2014 BRIT Awards: Brilliant Bastille and Harry Styles’ Toilet Break

I love the BRIT Awards. I love the Britishness of it all, I  adore the constant Harry Styles’ bashing and I am smitten with the fact that you can swear as much as you like without actually giving a shit.

Yes, the BRIT Awards are awesome. So let’s start this very subjective recap, shall we?

PS: Since the BRIT Awards were a show of awesome ups and hilarious downs, I thought it would be appropriate to make a clear BEST vs. WORST distinction.

WORST: “Sorry, I was having a wee”

For the second year in a row, One Direction won the Global Success Award but when the boys went on stage to accept the award, someone was missing. Yes, I’m talking about the idiot with the silly exploding hair. When Harry Styles finally managed to make it to the stage, sounding somewhat exhausted, he said the following phenomenally idiotic words: “Sorry, I was having a wee, the toilets are ages away.”

Yeah right. Nice try, Harry. Nice try.

BEST: James Corden’s hilarious jokes about Harry Styles’ toilet break

Gotta love James Corden’s naughty remarks! Straight after One Direction accepted the award, Corden delightfully quipped: “ Yeah, right. He couldn’t even wait until the end of the show”

Hilarious!

And later, when Corden introduced the Best British Single Award, he revisited Harry’s weird toilet-timing by brilliantly stating “My money was on Harry Styles (winning this award), but after what just happened in the toilet…”

Double Hilarious!

If you thought the Harry Styles bashing was over, you were in for a treat! Because when Corden was strolling around the audience and spotted Harry he added as a final funny sneer: “I don’t care what you were doing in there, as long as you’re careful.”

Triple Hilarious!

BEST: Pharell’s Hat was back!

I’m actually growing quite fond of it

WORST: Bruno’s Hat

Dear Bruno,

You know how much I love you, your music, your performances and everything that involves you thrusting your hips in a certain direction, but your silly hat really annoyed me last night.

Congrats on the BRIT Award, though.

BEST: Beyoncé performing XO in a stunning sparkly skin tight emerald green dress.

WORST: Beyoncé’s hair.

Seriously, can it look more fake than that?

BEST: Tinie Tempah looking all smoldering-hot and dapper in a three-piece polka dot(!) suit

Damn.

WORST: Kylie’s dress, the Kylie- overload during the commercial breaks and … well… practically all things Kylie.

I can’t help it, but I really don’t like Kylie Minogue. I hate her over-enthusiastic behaviour on The Voice UK, I hate her perfect small feet, the commercial for Priceless Surprise (that we had to endure over and over again!)made me cringe and that latex dress with the massive bow was just…

BEST: Katy Perry’s dress and Cleopatra haircut

Even her Aztec-inspired stage outfit looked super cool!

WORST: Ellie Goulding’s sense of style

Her red carpet dress already made my blood boil (princess dress gone rogue!)

But the outfit she wore while performing her hit Burn truly gave me a heart attack.

Although I completely adored the fancy golden bra, I was too tormented by the sight of that horrible white short to appreciate the splendidness of it all.

BEST: Bastille. Oh my…

I may not have mentioned this before but I am a huge Bastille fan. ( “Huge” as in: I-would-gladly-wave-my- bra -in –the-air-to-get-their-attention huge)The performance they gave last night was unbelievably exhilarating and all those drums really got my blood pumping.

Luckily for me, I will be seeing Bastille live on stage on my birthday. Yes, my birthday! They’ll be coming to Belgium on March 11 to give a concert and guess who will be attending? Moi! Talking about an amazing birthday present!

However, there is something that would make my birthday even more special… if lead singer Dan (Isn’t he just adorable?)could sing Happy Birthday in front of the entire audience for me.

That isn’t too much to ask, is it? 😉

So, dear Bastille

If any of you guys is reading this: My name is Eveline and I will be turning 23 on March 11.

Much appreciated!

Me, Myself and I: 14 songs that say F*** You To Valentine’s Day

For some odd reason, most people feel sorry for you when they find out you’ll be single on Valentine’s Day.  I have no idea why. Being single on February 14^th is the best thing on this planet.

Think about it: You don’t have to spend money on a new dress. New shoes. New jewelry. You don’t have to shave your legs. You can eat as much garlic bread as you like and you don’t have to torment yourself by either sitting in an overcrowded restaurant for an over-expensive dinner or by pretending you like his home-cooked meal (when in reality chewing on a dry piece of overcooked salmon is giving you anything but a culinary orgasm).

And most of all: You. Don’t. Have. To. Share. The. Bottle. Of. Wine.

Case closed, I would say.

Being single on Valentine’s Day is fucking awesome. And that is why we should celebrate it! Forget all those cheesy romantic love songs! For once, John Legend and his “All Of Me” can go to hell! It is time for some empowering Single-And-Rocking-It music! Whether you have just broken up with your boyfriend, got dumped or just – the audacity!- like being a single independent lady, these are the songs you have to listen to:

I will survive – Gloria Gaynor

Best. Lyrics. Ever.

Just take a shampoo bottle, strip down to your underwear and sing and dance around the living room feeling absolutely marvelous.

Fuck You- CeeLo Green

Technically this song is about a man telling his ex to shove it, but I assume singing the F-word whilst doing some shimmy shimmies will definitely work inspirational for you as well.

Hit the Road Jack- Ray Charles

No better way to get over your ex than by replacing the name Jack with your ex’s name.

Trust me. It’s very therapeutic.

Single- Natasha Bedingfield

“I’m single right now and that is how I want to be.” I couldn’t have said it better myself. Follow Natasha’s lead and sing along to your own Declaration of Independence!

So What – Pink

This is by far the most kick-ass break-up song on the planet. The beat is super duper exhilarating, the video is hilarious and the lyrics are spot on:

“I guess I just lost my husband, I don’t know where he went. So I’m gonna drink my money, I’m not gonna pay his rent. I’ve got a brand new attitude and I’m gonna wear it tonight…”

 

 

I Don’t Need a Man – Pussycat Dolls

Boyfriends are totally overrated. We girls can take care of ourselves!

 

 

Marriage Is For Old Folks- Nina Simone

Great words of wisdom : “One married he. One married she. Whaddya got? Two people watching TV.”

Since you’ve been gone – Kelly Clarkson

There is nothing more liberating than singing your lungs out to Kelly Clarkson’s best song ever. Don’t worry about the neighbours and their possible noise complaints. Go for it, girl!

Beyoncé

Beyoncé isn’t just one of the greatest stars of today, she probably has written more women empowerment songs than any other artist before her. Her feminist anthems encourage women to stand up. To be confident. To be themselves. To shine.

Single Ladies

Me, Myself & I

Irreplaceable

Independent women Part 1 – Destiny’s Child

One of the best women empowerment songs in music history, and Beyoncé –again!- had something to do with it.

“If I wanted the watch you’re wearin’, I’ll buy it
The house I live in, I’ve bought it
The car I’m driving, I’ve bought it
I depend on me, I depend on me”

Stronger – Britney Spears

Ah, good ol’ Britney. Back in the day when she still made rather brilliant pop music (don’t deny it, ladies! You all loved Britney in the early 00s!), she released one song that totally makes up for all the shitty songs she’s bombarding us with nowadays. Stronger not only is a great karaoke song, it also celebrates the triumphant victory of a girl getting over her D-Bag boyfriend.

Strong Enough- Cher

It might not be the wisest thing to declare my love for a Cher song on the internet, but just listen to the lyrics!

Don’t pretend you didn’t song along too!

Grammys 2014 Recap: Katy’s Dress, Pharrell’s Hat and Macklemore’s Wedding

Contrary to popular opinion, the Grammy Awards are never about the actual Grammys. I’m sure the winners are very happy and all- because they now have something to decorate their mantelpiece with- but apart from them we (aka the public) don’t really give a shit.

The real reason why everyone loves the Grammys is because it is a night full of great performances (Katy Perry burnt at the stake!), great dresses ( Alicia Keys!) and great acceptance speeches (Jay-Z!)

And this year, it was also about Pharrell’s hat.

But more on that later.

Let’s start with the red carpet:

Not entirely sure whether Katy Perry’s wedding dress meets Ballerina Tutu is actually flattering, but who the fuck cares! It is a dress printed with music notes! ….MUSIC NOTES!

Alicia Keys looks stunning in this deep cut, cobalt gown and don’t you just love that hairdo??

Taylor Swift has a huge soft spot for sparkly Hollywood glamour dresses. She looks amazing in this glittery Gucci dress, but it is starting to get boring seeing her for the umpteenth time in a different version of the same dress. Don’t be afraid to shake things up from time to time, Miss Swift!

Apparently she took my advice too literally and ended up head-banging behind the piano later on that evening.

Pink totally rocked this coral red Joanna Johansson dress! (Look at the detail on that bustier!)

Needless to say that she changed into a more comfortable outfit before she went on stage and did all those acrobatic stunts.

Love the cane. That is practically the only positive thing I can say about Madonna’s Ralph Lauren outfit. I usually love tuxedos on women, but somehow this just all looks too clownesk. What do you think?

Most stylish dudes of the evening: Ryan Lewis and Macklemore. They are the living proof that tuxedos don’t have to be boring, if you opt for a bold print (Ryan’s super cool houndstooth print!) or fabric ( Macklemore’s awesome velvet!)

Pharrell Williams was the talk of the town yesterday evening and it surprisingly didn’t have anything to do with his great performance but with his choice of hat. By the end of the night it even had its own Twitter Account!

I thought it looked ridiculous but on the other hand it distracted us from that awful red jacket

Beyoncé reminds us all what Bootylicious is all about.

Talking about Beyoncé, I think it is about time I start discussing the performances of the night!

Beyoncé and Jay-Z kicked off the show with a smoldering hot performance of Drunk in Love. It started on a black chair and it ended with the two love birds holding hands and dancing together. Beyoncé proved once again that she is the sexiest woman on the planet: her dance routine, her voice and –daaaamnnn-that outfit. I’m sure everyone in the audience wanted to take a shower after their performance. (Beyoncé, on the other hand, apparently had already taken one, because her hair was wet)

John Legend made all our hearts melt… again.

God, Chrissy Teigen truly is the luckiest girl in the world.

Daft Punk performing together with their best pal Pharrell, Nile Rodgers and the one and only Stevie Wonder: it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that this was insanely good.

But it wasn’t the best moment.  That moment came when Macklemore and Ryan Lewis performed their hit Same Love while 33 couples wed live on air. With Queen Latifah officiating. I thought I was going to cry. (Correction: I did cry. )

Kleenex anyone?

Looking into the Future: 13 bold Predictions for 2014

Forget Professor Trelawney from the Harry Potter saga. If you want to know what will happen in 2014, there is only one person you need to go to, and that person does not reside in Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry but lives in Belgium.

I’m talking about me.

Yes, moi. I can predict the future in a very peculiar way that is both universal and accurate…ish.

What will this year’s new trends be?

What will become acceptable and what will become repugnant?

Career? Love life? Money?

Everything you want to know about 2014 is right here for you to read. (You can thank me later.)

I can literally hear you all thinking: “Is this information trustworthy?”

It is.

“Is she a reliable fortune teller?”

I am.

Because just like I could predict all the 13 things listed below, I can also predict with 100 per cent certainty that you will have forgotten everything on this list before the end of the year.

Ha!

Like I said, eat this Professor Trelawney.

2014 according to Eveline:

1)      It will no longer be acceptable to wear uggs in public

Those ugg-ly and ugg-flattering shoes of the devil used to be worn by everyone. Especially campus girls had the crazy idea that they needed to wear them to look fab. Let me tell you something: this ugg-ly epidemic needs to stop. Throw them in the bin, burn them or give them to your cat (preferably with very sharp claws). Whatever you do, just never ever wear them.

Or people will start throwing eggs at your head.

Or uggs.

Or eggs in uggs.

2)      Miley Cyrus  will do something stupid…or vulgar. Probably both.

… Like marrying Justin Bieber.

3)      Leonardo DiCaprio will give his new girlfriend a ride in a super deluxe Tesla car with Gull-wing doors

Although I was able to get a clear image of the car, the face of the girl was rather a blur. So if you want to take your chance and seduce Mr. DiCaprio, feel free to try!

Though I should warn you: since I have made this prediction, I sincerely feel I should be the first to ask him out.

So hands off, bitches!

4)      E.L. James will be looking for a new assistant to help her with future novels.

Dear Ms James, consider this my application.

5)      Peruvian food will conquer the world.

Get your taste buds ready, because what was once considered a cuisine just for health gurus and food snobs, has now become so incredibly cool, it is simply impossible to ignore.

6)      One Direction will write a chicklit novel.

That is to say, someone will write it for them. And it will become a worldwide bestseller.

7)      You will buy your first pair of Louboutins

I don’t know where you will get the money from – maybe you will find yourself a sugar daddy? Or close a very fraudulous but lucrative deal on Wall Street? – I just now that you will need to make some room in your shoe closet.

8)      Ian Somerhalder will be looking for a woman to carry his baby.

DIBS!

9)The most popular baby names will be Katniss and Peeta.

In 2014 the third Hunger Games movie will come out in theaters all over the world and I could tell from the fortuitous arrangement of leaves in my cute tea cup that the Hunger Games frenzy will go even one step further than last year’s absurd craziness. So prepare yourself for some Hunger Games inspired baby names! May the odds be ever in their favour!

10)Bruno Mars and John Legend will write and record a song together…

… and Justin Timberlake will choreograph the accompanying dance routine!

… and Ryan Gosling will make a cameo appearance in the music video! (Shirtless of course)

11) Texting is sooo 2012

This year we’ll be going back to old-school romantic parchment and quill. (Including messenger owls)

12)Sanity is overrated

We are all freaks of nature and in 2014 we will finally live up to that!

13) Eating popcorn with chopsticks will be a thing

No comment. Just trust me on this one.

So in short, in 2014 you will go on a date with Leonardo DiCaprio, driving around in a posh car while listening to a new song by John Legend and Bruno Mars. On that same date you will probably run over some ugg-wearing women and catch a glimpse of Miley and Justin making out in the bushes outside Taco Bell. You will, however, break up with Leo because you cannot live with someone who doesn’t like Peruvian food. You will write naughty stuff together with E.L. James and will be crazy enough to figure out some insane scheme to buy Louboutin shoes. You will bump into Ian Somerhalder at the book shop and you will bond over the awesomeness of One Direction’s first chicklit. Both of you will communicate with each other through parchment and quill and on your first date you will go to the movies and eat popcorn with chopsticks. You will get pregnant with twins and will name them Peeta and Katniss.

And that, Ladies, all in just one year.

2014 is going to be amazing.