Understanding Romance: 8 Love Lessons from Hollywood Movies

WARNING: The following post contains dangerous amounts of gooey lovey-dovey stuff topped with a poisonous sauce of sarcasm…

Romance. It is a topic that has enthralled people all over the world for centuries. We all desire it. Poets write about it. Singers sing about it and Hollywood serves it to us on a plate full of glitz and glamour.

Yes, romance is something we all want. It is universal, but the million dollar question is: are our expectations about romance realistic?

Since I am probably the biggest sucker for all things romantic, I decided to dig into my past and find out what has influenced my image of romance.

Needless to say that I have Hollywood to blame for my (unrealistic?) expectations of romance. Especially all those romantic movies with handsome men with dreamy eyes and even dreamier six-packs.

Here is a collection of all the things I have learnt about romance and love from my favourite Hollywood movies. Feel free to comment or to tell me some of the valuable lessons you have learnt so far.

Lesson Nr. 1: If he wants you, he will let you know.

Remember that one scene from the Notebook that made you choke back soft sobs? It is a heartbreakingly beautiful declaration of love and it made all of us girls believe in the braveness and honesty of men. If he wants you, he will shout it from the rooftops and he won’t stop until he gets you! Now, isn’t that a lovely thought?

Reality check: 2/10

Living in Belgium, I can tell you that most men do not openly declare their love for you. They just sit around playing videogames and drinking beer, while you do all the hard work.

Lesson Nr. 2: If you jump, he jumps.

Could there possibly be a more romantic movie than Titanic? A chivalrous guy risking his life to save yours is something fit for fairy tales or EL James novels.

Reality check: not applicable

Let’s hope you’ll never get stuck in a situation in which you would willingly want to jump of a ship, shall we?

Lesson Nr. 3: If you can’t find the right guy, you can always date a handsome stripper

When Magic Mike was released in theatres last year, I was over the moon with excitement! Channing Tatum! Matt Bomer! Alex Pettyfer! And they are all taking their clothes off!

Reality check: 0/10

Chances are practically non-existent of ever meeting a stripper as handsome as Matt Bomer. Feel free to try and look for him, but trust me when I say that it would be a waste of time.

Lesson Nr. 4: Sometimes you will need to take some risks…

I’m not suggesting you should sail to Tortuga and fight some un-dead creepy pirates, but creativity now and then doesn’t hurt. At least, that’s what Jack Sparrow taught me.

Reality Check: 9/10

I’m just a huge sucker for bonkers ideas.

Lesson Nr. 5: He will be witty.

We all want a guy who makes us laugh. Someone who is able to make a distinction between witty sarcastic remarks and plain insults. It’s a fine line, I know. But Ryan Reynolds in the Proposal does a brilliant job!

Reality check: 7/10

Come one, guys! Show us what you’ve got!

Lesson Nr. 6: Make sure they remember you.

This valuable lesson is not just applicable to romance or –you know- survival at the Hunger Games, but it pretty much sums up everything you need to do to win.

Reality Check: 10/10

Haymitch for President!

Lesson Nr. 7: A guy will send you love letters

“Dear Holly, I don’t have much time. I don’t mean literally, I mean you’re out buying ice cream and you’ll be home soon. But I have a feeling this is the last letter, because there is only one thing left to tell you. It isn’t to go down memory lane or make you buy a lamp, you can take care of yourself without any help from me. It’s to tell you how much you move me, how you changed me. You made me a man, by loving me Holly. And for that, I am eternally grateful… literally. If you can promise me anything, promise me that whenever you’re sad, or unsure, or you lose complete faith, that you’ll try to see yourself through my eyes. Thank you for the honor of being my wife. I’m a man with no regrets. How lucky am I. You made my life, Holly. But I’m just one chapter in yours. There’ll be more. I promise. So here it comes, the big one. Don’t be afraid to fall in love again. Watch out for that signal, when life as you know it ends. P.S. I will always love you.”

Sigh.

Okay, so technically Gerry was already dead when Holly received his letters, but you have to admit that when you saw PS: I love You (or read the book) you were secretly hoping that your guy would one day write one for you as well…

Reality check: 1/10

Let’s face it, Ladies. Men do not write love letters. Unless his name is Shakespeare, Napoleon or Beethoven…

Lesson Nr. 8: In romance, we are all a bit crazy…

Seriously. Does anybody actually manage to think straight when he or she is in love? If even Harry Potter couldn’t keep his mind on the game (a.k.a. kill Voldemort) because he was too bewitched by Ginny, how are mere mudbloods like us ever going to be able to maintain focus? We are all just a bunch of headless hens running around in bewilderment until we find a nice nest to sit in…

Reality Check: 10/10

I don’t know about you, but I certainly am one of those bambling and bumbling baboons.

Romantic Food for Dummies: How to Woo her with an Easy and Stress-Free Menu

We all know the drill: when someone you love cooks you dinner, you are supposed to smile and devour the food with much joy and plenty of gleeful oohs and aahs. Yes, even if the food tastes like shit. Based on what I’ve learned from all the romantic comedies I’ve ever watched in my entire life, a girl will always say the food is delicious because she loves him. “It’s the gesture that counts” and all that mumbo jumbo. Chewing on a piece of burnt chicken is something we just have to willingly except and go through.

Sigh.

Love. It makes us do silly things.

Well guess what, dear readers? No matter how much I love someone, there will always be one thing I will secretly love more: food.

Is that a horrible thing to say? Maybe. But I just know that there are plenty of people out there who secretly agree with me. Admit it, ladies. A splendid chocolate mousse or an awkward dinner? You don’t even have to be a self-absorbed egomaniac to prefer the food over the man and surrender to the flawless qualities of a heavenly dessert.

However, I like to believe that with a little bit of effort we can actually achieve both the delicious and the entertaining. A lover who can entertain not only your body but your taste buds as well! Yes, you’ve read that correctly. The perfect world is within our reach!

That is, if you follow this menu. This 3-course dinner for two is impossible to screw up. Even the clumsiest of boyfriends will be able to embrace his Jamie Oliver swag and cook you an awesomely easy yet super delicious meal. This easy peasy menu is a funky combination of ultimate classics and creative twists and will give him the opportunity to spoil you with some homemade loveliness without breaking out into a sweat.

So are you ready to be wooed, dear ladies?

Here is my menu:

The Roomer Cocktail

Fill two glasses with red fruit and pour some ice cold Roomer (elderflower wine) on top of them. (Alternatively you could also use prosecco with elderflower syrup) Simple yet insanely yummy.

Croque Madame Muffins

One of the best recipes of Rachel Khoo. A traditional croque Madame shaped like a muffin: can it get any better than this?

Ingredients (makes 6)

• 6 slices of white bread, crusts cut off
• 3 tbsp melted butter
• 3 large slices of cooked ham
• 6 egg yolks

For the béchamel sauce:

• Knob of butter
• 1 tbsp flour
• White pepper
• Nutmeg
• 250ml milk
• 50 gr grated cheese

Method:

1. Preheat the oven to 180°C. Flatten the slices of bread with a rolling pin, then brush each slice on both sides with melted butter.
2. Gently press the slices into a muffin tin. Cut the large slices of ham in two and line each mold of bread with half a slice of ham. Now put an egg yolk into each bread muffin
3. Make the béchamel: Melt the butter in a pan over a medium heat. Add the flour and beat hard until you have a smooth paste. Gradually add the milk, whisking constantly and season with salt, pepper and nutmeg. Once the sauce has a yoghurt consistency, stir in the grated cheese. (The sauce is supposed to be rather thick so that it can “sit” on top of your muffin.)
4. Spoon 1-2 tbsp of béchamel on to each egg yolk and finish with an extra sprinkling of grated cheese and  white pepper. Put in the oven for 15 minutes.

Gorgonzola and Fig Pizza with Rocket and Brazil Nuts

Pungent gorgonzola, sweet figs, bitter rocket and crunchy nuts. Take it from me, this is by far the best pizza on the planet. Not only does it taste like food prepared for the Gods, it also looks like it came straight from heaven and landed on your plate. Hallelujah!

Ingredients (for one pizza):

• One portion of readymade pizza dough
• 4 figs, cut into slices
• 100-150gr gorgonzola (depending on the size of your pizza)
• 100gr rocket
• Handful of brazil nuts, roughly chopped
• 1 tbsp dried thyme
• Olive oil
• Pistachio oil (optional)

Method:

1. Preheat the oven to 220°C.
2. Brush your pizza dough with olive oil and sprinkle generously with dried thyme.
3. Crumble the gorgonzola cheese over the pizza, followed by the slices of fresh figs. Season with pepper.
4. Put in the oven for 12-15 minutes.
5. Just before serving, sprinkle the chopped nuts over the pizza and arrange the rocket in a somewhat artsy way on top of it. Drizzle with pistachio oil if you want.

Chocolate Mousse with Baileys and Red Berries

Chocolate. Baileys. Red Fruit: Expressing  your love was never this easy.

Ingredients (serves 2):

• 125gr milk chocolate
• 125ml double cream
• 1 egg white
• 4 tbsp Baileys Chocolat Luxe
• Red berries

Method:

1. Melt the chocolate au bain marie.
2. Whisk together the cream and egg white until your mixture forms soft peaks.
3. Whisk in the Baileys.
4. Stir a tablespoon of the cream mixture through the melted chocolate and mix well. Now pour this mix back into the Baileys cream and stir until you get a beautifully even mousse.
5. Spoon the mousse into glasses and put in the fridge for at least 2 hours.
6. Decorate with a generous portion of red fruit.

Me, Myself and I: 14 songs that say F*** You To Valentine’s Day

For some odd reason, most people feel sorry for you when they find out you’ll be single on Valentine’s Day.  I have no idea why. Being single on February 14^th is the best thing on this planet.

Think about it: You don’t have to spend money on a new dress. New shoes. New jewelry. You don’t have to shave your legs. You can eat as much garlic bread as you like and you don’t have to torment yourself by either sitting in an overcrowded restaurant for an over-expensive dinner or by pretending you like his home-cooked meal (when in reality chewing on a dry piece of overcooked salmon is giving you anything but a culinary orgasm).

And most of all: You. Don’t. Have. To. Share. The. Bottle. Of. Wine.

Case closed, I would say.

Being single on Valentine’s Day is fucking awesome. And that is why we should celebrate it! Forget all those cheesy romantic love songs! For once, John Legend and his “All Of Me” can go to hell! It is time for some empowering Single-And-Rocking-It music! Whether you have just broken up with your boyfriend, got dumped or just – the audacity!- like being a single independent lady, these are the songs you have to listen to:

I will survive – Gloria Gaynor

Best. Lyrics. Ever.

Just take a shampoo bottle, strip down to your underwear and sing and dance around the living room feeling absolutely marvelous.

Fuck You- CeeLo Green

Technically this song is about a man telling his ex to shove it, but I assume singing the F-word whilst doing some shimmy shimmies will definitely work inspirational for you as well.

Hit the Road Jack- Ray Charles

No better way to get over your ex than by replacing the name Jack with your ex’s name.

Trust me. It’s very therapeutic.

Single- Natasha Bedingfield

“I’m single right now and that is how I want to be.” I couldn’t have said it better myself. Follow Natasha’s lead and sing along to your own Declaration of Independence!

So What – Pink

This is by far the most kick-ass break-up song on the planet. The beat is super duper exhilarating, the video is hilarious and the lyrics are spot on:

“I guess I just lost my husband, I don’t know where he went. So I’m gonna drink my money, I’m not gonna pay his rent. I’ve got a brand new attitude and I’m gonna wear it tonight…”

 

 

I Don’t Need a Man – Pussycat Dolls

Boyfriends are totally overrated. We girls can take care of ourselves!

 

 

Marriage Is For Old Folks- Nina Simone

Great words of wisdom : “One married he. One married she. Whaddya got? Two people watching TV.”

Since you’ve been gone – Kelly Clarkson

There is nothing more liberating than singing your lungs out to Kelly Clarkson’s best song ever. Don’t worry about the neighbours and their possible noise complaints. Go for it, girl!

Beyoncé

Beyoncé isn’t just one of the greatest stars of today, she probably has written more women empowerment songs than any other artist before her. Her feminist anthems encourage women to stand up. To be confident. To be themselves. To shine.

Single Ladies

Me, Myself & I

Irreplaceable

Independent women Part 1 – Destiny’s Child

One of the best women empowerment songs in music history, and Beyoncé –again!- had something to do with it.

“If I wanted the watch you’re wearin’, I’ll buy it
The house I live in, I’ve bought it
The car I’m driving, I’ve bought it
I depend on me, I depend on me”

Stronger – Britney Spears

Ah, good ol’ Britney. Back in the day when she still made rather brilliant pop music (don’t deny it, ladies! You all loved Britney in the early 00s!), she released one song that totally makes up for all the shitty songs she’s bombarding us with nowadays. Stronger not only is a great karaoke song, it also celebrates the triumphant victory of a girl getting over her D-Bag boyfriend.

Strong Enough- Cher

It might not be the wisest thing to declare my love for a Cher song on the internet, but just listen to the lyrics!

Don’t pretend you didn’t song along too!

It’s delightful, it’s delicious, it’s de-lovely: Heart Prints in Fashion

I’m in a romantic mood today. Seriously, my day is filled with little elements of romantic-desiring behaviour and it isn’t even two o’clock in the afternoon yet!

Need some proof? Okay, here it is:

One: I have the urge to re-watch the Notebook. Or Titanic. Will probably watch both.
Two: I’m overdosing on John Legend music.
Three: I’ve already lit four scented candles in the past thirty minutes.
Four: I bought myself a huge box of chocolates. (Admittedly, I eat chocolate every day but today I’m going particularly overboard on the cocoa)
Five: I winked at a handsome stranger.

See? I’m practically on the verge of throwing hand-cut heart confetti at everyone in the street.

Given this romantic attitude, I think it is time to highlight some very lovable fashion for you all.

For years, romantic souls like me had to deal with those dreaded skulls on every possible garment. I assume people loved this trend because it made them look tough, but to be honest, all these skulls just reminded me of death and horror movies. I mean, when people look at you, wouldn’t you want them to associate your personality with joy and love, instead of death and walking zombies?

Anyway, apparently I was one of the few who actually thought like that. But fear no more fellow romance- cravers: the era of the skull print is over!

This season’s print is all about showing love and affection. In a society in which showing emotions is –unfortunately and to my great frustration- frowned upon, this trend encourages us to step away from this collective coolness. This season, we are done remaining frozen and incapable of expressing our emotions. Let it out people!

And a first step to a more open emotional life is buying yourself some heart print clothes. This print isn’t just something you wear on Valentine’s Day, the symbol of love can be worn every single day of the year. These prints will make you feel cherished and alive. Drop that veil of calm collective posture, ladies. Trust me, it won’t make you vulnerable. It will only make you drop dead gorgeous.

This amazing trend was launched by Burberry Prorsum. The creative team behind Burberry put heart prints on practically every available piece of fabric. Apart from this very lovable print, the collection had everything a girl could possibly wish for: a silhouette of tight pencil skirts and breezy blouses, fabrics to die for (from soft cashmere to elegant leather or daring translucent rubber)and the elegant colours (beige and bordeaux) make the collection look feminine, not girly.

Even guys are allowed to show how much they love us!

These shoes from Charlotte Olympia are called “Love Me”.

Now, I don’t think that will be much of a problem.

If you’re looking for a subtler approach to the trend, heart-print accessories might be something for you!

What about these adorable socks?

Or these cute glasses?

For the daredevils among you: don’t you think these tights with encrusted heart knee pads are just mesmerizingly beautiful?

After such an overdose of heart-shaped loveliness, I think it’s only appropriate to seal this post with a big kiss.

What his Fragrance says about his Personality

What could be more perfect than finding the man of your dreams? Finding the man of your dreams who even smells fantastic of course!

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: there is nothing sexier than a guy wearing a delicious perfume.

Seriously. There isn’t.

Moreover, I am a firm believer of character revealing fragrances. Just like us women, men choose fragrances that match their mood, their personality or their desires. So If you want to find out if your guy is a player? Smell him. Or want to know whether he will send you flowers? Smell him. His hobbies? Smell him. His sense of style? Smell him.

Smell. Everything starts from there.
All the rest is up to you.

Here is a selection of my personal favourite male fragrances and just for the sake of argument I’ve added a description of possible character traits.

Dior Homme by Dior

The Fragrance: the purity of bergamot, the freshness of grapefruit and the sensuality of musk. All bottled in a sleek and clean looking flask with menacingly black details.

The Guy: Christian Grey

A powerful businessman, always impeccably dressed and with a mysterious and seductive broody elegance. A man who knows how to spoil a woman, but also, knows how to use handcuffs.

Gentlemen only by Givenchy

The Fragrance: a classic fragrance with subtle hints of aromatic spices and intense woody notes. In a basic bottle, because it’s what’s inside that counts.

The Guy: Superman

Charming, elegant and always willing to lend a hand. This guy will gladly put an S on his chest if it means winning you over and conquering your heart. He doesn’t care about technology and urban riches. All he needs to survive is you and your damsel-in-distress attitude.

Le Male by Jean Paul Gaultier

The Fragrance: Seductive and masculine. Those are the key words that come to mind when you inhale the aromas of Jean Paul Gaultier’s classic fragrance. The boldness of a bottle in the shape of a male torso indicates the type of men the creative genius was aiming at: a man with extreme sexuality and masculinity.

The Guy: James Bond

This man loves his classics. To him it’s all about strong and old-fashioned chivalry, dipped into a delicious sauce of borderline cliché sensuality. Dangerous yet oh so charming.( And he’ll always pay for your cocktail.)

He Wood by Desquared2

The Fragrance: As the name of this fragrance may suggest, this scent is all about wood. Think early morning walks through the forest… dew drops on fir needles… birds chirping around in the sky…

The Guy: Nature Boy

An outdoorsman. This man doesn’t believe in fairy tales or material belongings. What he cares about is living in the moment, enjoying all the things that nature has to offer. He looks strong and tough but under that hard exterior lies a fragile heart that breaks far too easily

Spice Bomb by Victor and Rolf

The Fragrance: an explosion of aromas in a very menacing bomb-like bottle. This fragrance isn’t for the faint hearted but for those who want to make a statement. Blending in is no longer an option.

The Guy: The Painter

A young and extravagant dandy whose explosion of emotions can often be both overwhelming and detonatingly seductive. He doesn’t do “less is more”; to him it’s all about expressing what’s inside through creative art, design and fashion.

Boss Orange by Hugo Boss

The Fragrance: The freshness of apple, citrus and coriander blend joyfully with the exciting hint of Szechuan pepper and vanilla beans. The bottle is straightforward and open, just like him.

The Guy: The carefree surfer

“The glass is always half full” is his ultimate lifestyle motto. His optimistic and relaxed view on life makes him fun to be around. Hence, his insanely large group of friends who always seem to be wanting a piece of him. Apart from his incredible social skills, this guy adores sports. From fitness workouts to games of basketball, but his true passion lies in the waves. Him and his board are inseparable. Good luck getting between those two, girl!

The Perks of Being Single

Flying solo. There’s probably an entire rainforest of books dedicated to the topic. However, no matter whether you like being a member of singletown or are looking for that special other to share your life with: Being single is not always that easy.

There is that awkward moment when an older relative starts making endless inquiries about settling down and starting a family.

There is that dreadful realization that your BFF from high school just got engaged (and consequently, you are now forced to look at cheesy photos of the two on Facebook. Barf. )

And then there is that unpleasant and god-awful situation when you go out for a drink with your friend and her guy and suddenly you start to feel like the third wheel. (Get a room! Is that really too much to ask?!)

Don’t get me wrong, it’s lovely if you have someone special in your life. It’s lovely to have someone to share special moments, secrets and affection with. Just don’t rub it in my face.

Seriously.

Although this may all sound really cynical, there are a lot of benefits to being single as well. And once you take notice of all these advantages, Singledom will not look so gloomy after all. In fact, being single is something you should cherish, because it is by far the only time in your entire life when you will be able to do whatever you want without someone raining on your parade. Of course, that’s not to say if Mr. Right would suddenly appear on my doorstep (in the form of Leonardo Dicaprio, Henry Cavill or Idris Elba), I wouldn’t ride happily into the sunset with him.

But until that day comes, I will rule the kingdom of Singlehood! And here are 7 great reasons why:

1. You can do whatever you want and you don’t have to explain yourself to anyone
Singledom is a celebration of your inner egomaniac. If you want to sleep until two in the afternoon? Great. If you want to eat a box of chocolates for breakfast? Who cares? If you want to spend an entire night flirting with random strangers in your local pub? There’s no jealous guy stopping you from doing so.

2. You can sleep in the middle of the bed.
You no longer have to fight for the blankets (hurrah!), you no longer have to listen to his snoring (double hurrah!) and you can wear terrifyingly neon green facial masks without having to worry about scaring him off (triple hurrah!)

3. You can be lazy all day if you want
Hallelujah! Now that your single, you’re no longer forced to wake up early on a Saterday morning to watch your boyfriend run after a ball in a less than mediocre game of football. Now, you can spend your Saturday morning doing nothing but treating yourself to some at-home-spa-sessions, including rubbing your entire body in glittery Cocoa and Pistachio body oil. And in the afternoon, it’s just you, your TV and a tub of ice-cream.

4. You’ve sole control of the remote
Singledom puts all the power in your hands! A New Girl marathon? Why not. Watching the umpteenth re-run of Titanic and still sobbing when Leo dies? Hell yeah!

5. You can turn up the music and dance around the house without someone judging you
Whether it’s the very impressive robot or a twerking show that would even make Miley Cyrus blush, you don’t have to worry about someone frowning at your demonstration of dance skills.

6. You can organize girly sleepovers in your apartment
Spending your evening in the company of your besties in your pj’s watching Magic Mike whilst gossiping about what-happened-to-high-school-bitch-A or O-my-God-did-you-see-Jennifer-Lawrence’s-new-hairdo and drinking lots of Malibu and eating inappropriately large Chicken Barbecue pizzas…
Is there anything more awesome than that?

7. You can eat whatever you want, whenever you want.
Whether you want to spend an entire week on a health cleanse -drinking nothing but kale smoothies- or just want to eat weird food combinations on weird moments of the day (i.e. spicy corn tortillas with Norwegian smoked salmon at 6 o’ clock in the morning or a bowl of muesli drenched in Baileys at midnight. ), it is all up to you and what your stomach is craving.

The Album everyone should be listening to: John Legend- Love in the Future

Five years of musical silence is a very long time. Even if you were the most brilliant artist on the planet, making the most insanely beautiful music, and even if I were your biggest fan in the whole wide world, that still wouldn’t be enough to keep me interested. In the end I would just move on –out of sight (or should I say ‘ear’?) out of mind- and look for other talent in the big musical pond.

So it pains me to say that I had totally forgotten about John Legend. I had all his albums, knew all his songs by heart in a way that it almost became eerie and I would sit in awe- drooling over so much hotness- every time he would be playing live on a television show. But like I said, even I lost touch with this brilliant singer. I moved on to other musical hotties. (Bruno Mars, that is. )

So you can imagine my surprise when, I suddenly saw an ad for his CD on the internet a couple of days ago. My heart skipped a beat. My breath caught in my throat. And I nearly started crying when it slowly dawned on me that his new album had already been out since September and I hadn’t even heard so much as a whisper about it. I felt like the worst fan in the world.

Needless to say that I wanted to make up for my absence in the wonderful paradise that is John Legend musical magic. I ran to the music store like a frantic lunatic and completely out of breath I asked the guy behind the counter where John Legend’s album was. He looked at me as if I were the most insane person he had ever met, but I didn’t really care. All I could think about was John Legend and nothing- or no one!- would stand in my way. What can I say? John Legend does to my emotions what Twitter does to the Wall street stock exchange: it makes them soar…

Love in the Future is without a doubt his best album so far. His lyrics are dipped in a melted chocolate blend of emotional philanthropy and all-consuming sensuality. The warm melodies- emphasized by symphonic strings, experimental percussion or simply his piano- are in beautiful harmony with his smooth yet so intense vocals.

If you don’t have this album in your CD collection already, I highly recommend purchasing it, for you won’t find anything that is better for your soul than this album. Fall victim to the sound of pure, unadulterated love and happiness. You deserve it!

To give you an idea of how amazing John Legend is, here are four of my favourite songs on the album:

1) All of Me:
The most touching lyrics on the planet…

So, who needs a handkerchief right now?
2) Asylum:
It’s as if he takes you on an experimental cloud of breathtaking delirium…

3) Wanna Be Loved:
An ideal song for a mellow evening. Imagine yourself swaying to the beat while you’re stirring in your risotto… perfect!

4) Save The Night:
My reaction when I first heard this song was a bit similar to this: