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The Oscars 2015: ScarJo’s Necklance, Gaga’s Gloves and Bradley the Vampire

Published February 23, 2015 by The Feminist

Last night was the night we had all been waiting for: The Oscars!

It was a splendid show, not only because Neil Patrick Harris showed up in his underwear (yassss)

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or Eddie Redmayne won (he won!),

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but especially because the marvelous Patricia Arquette had the guts to stand up and demand equal pay for women in the industry. Her speech gave me goosebumps and looking at how Meryl and J.LO reacted, I’m guessing it gave them goosebumps too…

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Anyway, what a wonderful night it was indeed!

So back to the dresses, because there is plenty to be said about last night’s parade. First of all, I often do NOT agree with the general opinion of all the other fashion bloggers. Why does everyone hate ScarJo’s necklace? Seriously, I luuuuuuv it. Why did they despise Gwyneth’s giant shoulder flower so much? I thought it looked amazing! And yes, maybe Lady Gaga’s gloves were a bit weird, but for heaven’s sake, it’s Lady Gaga we’re talking about!

So here is my very own red carpet report. Take it or leave it.

Just really really pretty…

You can always count on Kerry Washington to bring some elegance to the party.

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This Miu Miu gown with peplum may not be as bold as some of the other looks, but it definitely is really really pretty.

I’ve never been that much of a Jennifer Aniston fan. Not when it comes to her acting, and definitely not when it comes to her wardrobe choices, but damn, even I have to admit that that is one hell of a nice dress!

oscar jennifer

I’m a huge sucker for black and white colour-blocking myself, so Reese Witherspoon’s Tom ford ticks all the boxes in my opinion.

oscar reese

Jennifer Lopez often has the tendency to show off too much of her curves… and although you really can’t miss her very present plunging cleavage, the combination with the nude tones, the  transparency and the embellishments makes the entire look much more refined and classy.

oscar JL

I love the colour of Chrissy Teigen Zuhair Murad’s gown. But if there is anything I am truly thrilled about it’s her dark lipstick. Absolutely gorgeous!

oscar chrissy

Oprah Winfrey demonstrated that you don’t need a size zero to look stunning on a red carpet. This nude toned Vera Wang is sheer perfection.

oscar op

Did Dakota Johnson take another trip to the Red Room of Pain to find inspiration for the colour of her dress? Whatever she did, it paid off, because this red gown with a bold cut is just every fashionista’s dream!

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The boldly beautiful 

I have no idea why so many hated the necklace. Scarlet Johansson is making me green with envy over her stunning jewel! (pun fully intended)

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Kudos to Rosamund Pike! Her intricate, corset-like, Givenchy dress is seemed to the brim with roses.  It’s bold. It’s beautiful. It’s exactly what an Oscar dress should look like!

oscar rosamund

Emma Stone wearing Elie Saab. Things really cannot get any better than that.

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Although the slightly greenish gold is a difficult colour to pull off, Emma does it so well. Sigh.

Jennifer Hudson’s classic silhouette becomes stunning in this bold mellow-yellow hue.

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The beautifully bold

Lady Gaga wore hands down one of the most interesting dresses.  She looks totally otherworldly in this structural Azzedine Alaïa dress!

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And my guess is that, given the dish-washing gloves, she might as well be hiding a detergent spray underneath her skirt. To get rid of all those hateful comments about her dress, I presume. Haters gonna hate, Lady Gaga, so don’t care about these conservative party-poopers!

Why everyone else was so against Gwyneth Paltrow’s flower, is beyond me. Maybe all those critics simply aren’t blessed with the gift of looking at life through rose-coloured glasses?

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Anyway, I think Gwyneth’s cotton candy, regal-looking dress is awesome and all the haters could really use some fairy dust sprinkled in their asses.

The “Hmpf, you can do better”

Marion Cotillard may be wearing Dior, but it more looks like she took down her own shower curtain, perforated it with the perforator on her desk and if that wasn’t enough, decided to create a pouch at the height of her beautiful derriere with what seems to be scotch tape.

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Summarized: not the most flattering silhouette, Marion!

If I were still a Disney-loving six-year old, I would have adored Felicity Jones’ Cinderella gown. But I’m not six anymore. My princess-aspiring days are over (well sort of anyway), and even though I love the top part of the dress with the embellished high neck, the bottom part is just too bombastic and tent-like to be considered pretty in this age of realistic simplicity.

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Admittedly, Lupita has set an insanely high bar for herself on the red carpet, for she has always looked like a true goddess in all of her previous gowns. Although she still looks pretty god-like, I’m not very fond of her pearled Calvin Klein dress.

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For a dress that reportedly took an incredibly long time to make (with over 6000 pearls, pfew!), it seems pretty dull to me.

That gorgeous statement necklace aside, Cate Blanchett’s black gown is the perfect example of how black can often become boring.

oscar kate

The Men: More than Meh!

See that, ladies?

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Chris Pratt wants me. So hands off!

Matt McGorry looks incredible in this very bold, yet stunning textured jacket.

oscar matt mcgorry

Benedict Cumberbatch may not have won, but he secretly had some liquid comfort tucked away in his jacket.

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Can I take a sip, Benny?

And last but not least, I would like to take a moment to ponder the weird transformation Bradley Cooper has undergone these last few months. Is it just me or did he indeed go from sun-kissed (sometimes a tad too orange) God to an eerie-looking Vampire? Not sure whether this look is for a new movie or maybe he got allergic to self-tanner, but in any case,

oscar bradley vamp

somebody seriously needs to give the man some vitamin pills.

Bold. Beautiful. British: a BAFTA red carpet report

Published February 9, 2015 by The Feminist

Whereas most eyes were fixed on the Grammys , there was also plenty of glitz and glamour happening across the Atlantic at the Baftas. As befits a proper posh British party, there were no weird, distasteful, skanky outfits detectable (eat this, Grammys!). On the contrary, this year’s Baftas was a celebration of sheer elegance!

Here is my shortlist:

Keira Knightley finally wears a dress that truly matches her pregnancy glow. Much better than the monstrosities you wore at the other award shows, Keira!

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Eddie Redmayne, per usual, looks like an old-school, I-will-climb-your-ivory-tower gentleman in his velvet Armani suit and his wife Hannah Bagshaw is wearing a glorious dress that is making me even more envious of her being Eddie’s wife . Some girls truly have all the luck…

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Natalie Dorner’s dress may not be mention-worthy enough to make it onto my best-dressed list but the gloves! Those gloves!

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Not sure why both Lea and Monica look as if they got something sharp stuck up their ass. Why the sour faces, ladies? You both look stunning!

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Sunglasses. At night. At a red carpet event. With a tux. And a scarf. Any other man who would ever dare to wear all these things together would look absolutely ridiculous… not Cuba Gooding Jr., though. He looks like a god. A weirdly awesome and bonkers god.

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Luke Evans and Douglas Booth: not exactly memorable outfits, but who cares? Look at them. When you are that handsome, you could probably even pull off wearing a garbage sack as a pair of boxers. (Now, wouldn’t that be glorious?)

B7

B8

There was only one Hollywood actress that missed the elegant boat that night: Felicity Jones .

According to E! Online she “wowed” in this Dior gown…

B4

Not sure what they mean with “wowed”, but it looks to me as if her dress has been made during “arts & crafts” hour by a group of pre-school toddlers.

SAG Awards 2015: Seriously. Alluring. Gowns.

Published January 26, 2015 by The Feminist

Last night the crème de la crème of Hollywood gathered together for the SAG Awards. This can only mean one thing: we’re again one step closure the big finale, i.e. The Oscars.

So without further ado, here is a quick summary of last night’s most fabulous  (or in some cases: most disastrous) looks:

In the category “White is not just for weddings”:

White gowns are usually associated with weddings and flying doves, but these two stunning leading ladies demonstrate that there is nothing more breathtaking than a white gown worn with an attitude. Please, give it up for …

Reese Witherspoon

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Viola Davis

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In the category “Purple Rain”:

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It’s Keira Knightley, who still hasn’t figured out how to wear elegant pregnancy clothes that don’t look like a pile of granny tea towels.

sag cam

Although this category may contain one of the worst looks of the evening, it luckily also contains one of the night’s stunners. Camila Alves is the embodiment of pure elegance in this regal purple gown. Eat this, Keira!

In the category: No award show is complete without some dashing fellas

Camila’s husband, the ever so cool Matthew McConnaughey, shows everyone how it is done with this breathtakingly gorgeous tux. He’s the living proof that a suit doesn’t always have to be black.

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Side note: not so sure about that beard though.

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Eddie Redmayne looks swoon worthy in this classic, yet stylish suit. I can’t wait what he has in store for us at the Oscars!

In the category: Dark hues = instant glamour… Or maybe not?

Black is always a safe choice when it comes to award shows, for it will give you an instant elegant look…

Or at least that was what I thought, because Patricia Arquette gives us all a demonstration of how a gown with a dark colour can actually be quite the opposite of elegant and can make you look like an Ursula impersonator.

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So thank God for Julia Roberts! Not only does her outfit look incredibly elegant, her choice to opt for an unconventional jumpsuit makes it also one of the quirkier looks of the evening.

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In the category “Showing cleavages doesn’t necessarily guarantee a sexy look”

Whereas Kate Hudson blew everyone away with her plunging neckline at the Golden Globes, Jennifer Anniston looks kinda… I don’t know… cheap?

sag jen

To be honest, I even think I once had a bed spread with that print. (In my defense, that was a long long long time ago.)

In the category “Wear the colours of the rainbow”

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Julianne Moore wore one of my favourite dresses of the evening. This emerald green bejeweled beauty by Givenchy almost seems too gorgeous to be real.

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Uzo Aduba is proving herself to be one hell of a stylish woman. I could stare at this bright yellow intricate gown for days.

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The phrase “feeling blue” is given an entirely different interpretation by the Good Wife star Julianna Margulies. Forget depressive thoughts, this cobalt blue dress could possibly be the epitome of optimism.

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And last but not least, how could someone ever do a red carpet recap without mentioning the gorgeous, the wonderful, the absolutely stunning Lupita Nyong’o? For the umpteenth time Lupita looks like a dream come true in this envious Elie Saab gown.

Sigh. We can’t I be a Hollywood star?

Golden Globes 2015: Red Carpet Extravaganza and Cumberbatch the Great

Published January 12, 2015 by The Feminist

Last night the Golden Globes officially kicked off the most wonderful time of the year: awards season!

There were plenty of gorgeous dresses, some rather “meh” dresses and –unfortunately- the odd monstrosities.

And then there was Benedict Cumberbatch.

So get your inhalers ready, because this recap will take your breath away!

In the category “Safe is for pussies”:

It’s not easy to showcase a vavavoom cleavage, while keeping up a classy and elegant appearance (yes, I’m referring to you, Kim Kardashian), but Kate Hudson shows everyone how it is done.

golden kate

Naomi Watts literally lets the sunshine in with this yellow Gucci gown

golden naomi

Metallic. Ombre. Feathers. These are all marvelous fashion trends, but putting them together in one outfit might often appear too ostrich-trying-to-be-a-disco-diva… at least that’s what I thought. Jullianne Moore demonstrates that sometimes “less is more” is total bullshit.

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In the category “power suits for power women”:

Emma Stone in a flawless jumpsuit by Lanvin. (* feel free to start hyperventilating due to so much fabulousness.*)

golden emma

Lorde looks- very befitting to her name- regal in this men suit with crop top.

golden lorde

In the category “ Classic goddesses”:

Diane Kruger confirms once again that she is part human, part goddess

golden diane

Another goddess, ruling from Mount Olympia: it’s Jessica Chastain

golden jessica

Chrissy Teigen looks dreamy in Zuhair Murad. No wonder hubby John Legend feels like a god when he’s with her.

golden christie

In the category “questionable friendship”:

Lena Dunham thought it would be fun to wear some remaining Christmas wrapping paper to the Golden Globes… no wait, it’s Lena in a dress by her good friend Zac Posen! Are you sure he’s your friend, darling?

golden lena

Dear Keira, I know your pregnant, but that doesn’t give you the right to wear a 1950s tablecloth to the Golden Globes. Seriously. Only explanation? She must have pissed off bestie Herr Lagerfeld by getting pregnant (or as he would call it: “fat”) and this is how he “rewards” her.

golden keira

In the category “I can’t believe that’s Crazy Eyes!”:

Uzo Aduba looks stunning in this sequined dress.

golden Uzo

In the category “Lupita, Lupita, LUPITA!”:

It’s Lupita. (Duh.) In Giambattista Valli Couture. No comments necessary. Just sit back… and drool.

golden lupita

And if all this marvelous fashion wasn’t enough: Benedict Cumberbatch did it. Again. After U2 at the Oscars, he photobombed Meryl Streep… which makes him the most awesome human being on the planet. (But I’m assuming you already knew that 😉 )

cumberbatch-photobomb

10 reasons why you need to go and see Miss Julie

Published October 26, 2014 by The Feminist

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Sometimes, on very rare occasions, I do absolutely love living in Belgium.

Let me give you a couple of examples:

When another quality chocolate shop opens just a couple of blocks away from my apartment.

When there is a public holiday and I don’t have to go to work.

When it’s Film Fest Ghent.

Now, let me talk to you about that last one. Film Fest Ghent is my hometown’s very own film festival. It might not be as famous as the one in Berlin, and it is definitely not as glamorous as the one in Cannes, but it does have quite a lot of good films to offer.

And one of those films was “Miss Julie” with none other than Irish eye-candy Colin Farrell and my personal style icon Jessica Chastain. This movie, at first glance, may seem like your everyday Jane Austen-inspired tear jerker, but let me tell you: it is nothing of the sort. If I were to describe it, I would rather say it is a mash-up of One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest and Silver Lining’s Playbook, covered in some Pride & Prejudice cling film.

This film is abso-freakingly bonkers!

Needless to say, I loved it. And this is why:

  • Jessica Chastain

Like I said, I adore her. Not only does she demonstrate that you can be a successful Hollywood actress and not be blonde, but more importantly: the woman can act. Really act. Like, lump-in-throat act.

Her performance as Miss Julie is nothing short of stunning. She plays the ultimate spoiled brat, the drama Queen, and her character’s love for drama makes my own theatrical tantrums seem pretty minute, but Jessica is able to give all this intense drama a very human and believable edge. With a part like hers, it is always dangerous to start over-acting, but Miss Chastain knows what she’s doing. And man, it is an absolute joy to watch her.

  • Colin Farrell

The fact that the guy is easy on the eyes is something we have known for a very long time (after all ,we are not blind), but the fact that the guy can act (I mean really act) still surprises me from time to time. He is absolutely brilliant in his role as tormented soul and lover and his Irish accent is just to die for.

  • It’s drama!

You know me. I like a bit of theatre, and this film is drama from beginning till end.

  • These people are f***ing insane!

Both Miss Julie and Jean are bonkers. Schizophrenia, various compulsive disorders, panic attacks, delusional ramblings, you name it.

These people are so crazy, it kinda made me feel good about myself in a weird, slightly superficial way. Because yes,  I may be weird and bizarre from time to time, but at least I don’t go chopping off canaries’ heads. Which leads me to the next point:

  • (spoiler alert!) There is a dead canary!

And it is hilarious! Not because I like to see dead animals, of course not (that would be horrible!), but because it looked so incredibly fake it more resembled a Wallace & Gromit clay puppet than an actual bird.

  • The melancholic “I think I’m about to cry” -musical score

Bring on those tissues!

  • The dialogues!

The chemistry between Farrell and Chastain is undeniable and there are some pretty fab dialogues to prove it. The language-freak in me was on a two-hour high.

jessica-chastain-colin-farrell-miss-julie

  • The monologues!

Applause for Miss Chastain, because that one monologue were Miss Julie absolutely lost it (I mean, even more than her already pretty fucked up usual self) and went totally crazy, was Oscar-worthy. Yes, Oscar-worthy!

  • There is wine!

The movie made me thirsty. That says enough, right?

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  • And last but not least: there’s a cute dog!

Who doesn’t like a cute dog?

The Battle of the Hemsworths: Who would you pick, Chris or Liam? (Plus the Most Important Poll of the Day!)

Published August 10, 2014 by The Feminist

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A couple of nights ago, my best friend and I were re-watching the Hunger Games: Catching Fire. Why? Because it’s a great movie. Because Jennifer Lawrence is our personal role model. Because Liam Hemsworth is in it.

While we were watching that brutal scene in which Liam gets whipped by this evil dude from the Capitol, I asked my friend: Who do you actually prefer, Liam or his brother Chris?

What started as a random question swiftly turned into a fiery discussion. One that would eventually stretch over two whole days, in which not only me and my best friend enthusiastically ranted about both Hemsworth brothers, but other female friends  were pulled into the heated debate as well.

Some preferred Chris.

Others preferred Liam.

The really selfish (or should I say, smart?) preferred both of them.

To give you a good sense of what the discussion was all about, here is a list of our pros and cons for each of the boys:

Chris:

+

  • Subjectively the handsomest of the two. Friend A: “His face is like… carved by an angel using a golden chisel!”
  • His abs in Thor. Friend B: “Habba Habba!”
  • Older and hence, more mature.

  • His long hair. Me: “Jikes!”

Liam:

+

  • More masculine and robust facial structure. Friend C: “Makes him look like a real dude!”
  • Younger and hence, more likely to do silly stuff, like…say… go out with a Belgian girl.
  • He plays Gayle in the Hunger Games. Friend D: “Seriously, why would you ever decide to run off with a shorty like Peeta Melark, if you have a tall and handsome fella like Gale waiting for you at home?”

_

  • Miley Cyrus’ ex. Friend E: “If you can date a nutball like Miley, there is clearly something mentally wrong with you.”
  • Friend F: “Gayle is just a nagging whiner.”

 

As you can see, the cons list is not really that long, which makes making a decision even harder! Since I want to put to bed this pressing and highly important discussion once and for all, I need your help, dear readers! This is probably going to be the most important and most difficult question you have ever been asked: Who is the hottest, Chris or Liam?

Even more importantly, who would you like to date?

In order to guide this very tough decision, here are a couple of pics for you to gaze at.

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Chris Hemsworth shows off his ripped body as he chills by his hotel pool.

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liam hemsworth

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You’re welcome, by the way.

Now go on and fill in this poll:

 

 

My Newest Hollywood Crush: Oscar Isaac

Published July 1, 2014 by The Feminist

Oscar-Isaac

I know what you’re all thinking: “guuuurrlll, can’t you just pick one Hollywood hottie and stick with it?”

It’s a reasonable observation but not one I will actually take into consideration. Because your comment may sound reasonable to all those resilient to Hollywood hotness (seriously, I do not understand those people), but to me (as in: a true connoisseur of Hollywood male charcuterie) your comment equals absolute nonsense!

After all, my blog is called Fashion, Food and Flirts, so would it not be logical to be totally mesmerized by yet another Hollywood hunk when the opportunity presents itself?

Ha!

Try and refute that, grumpy hottie-hater!

And I am glad to announce that indeed one of those opportunities presented itself to me a couple of days ago…

Last week I rented Inside Llewyn Davis. I had already read great things about the film, but had not yet had the possibility to watch it. I was totally excited because our dearest J.T. was in it, but –surprise, surprise!- it wasn’t Mr. Timberlake who stole my heart, but an (at least to me) unknown actor named Oscar Isaac. Not only did he blow me away with his insane acting skills, he was also very intriguing and sexy… very sexy… But in a hushpuppy, homeless dude kinda way.

Oscar Isaac

So yes, I was intrigued.

Two days later I went to see Two Faces of January with my mom, because she wanted to see the movie. Dear mommy has a crush on Viggo Mortensen (one of the lead characters in the film) and wanted me to accompany her, but I initially refused because I honestly really really really hate Kirsten Dunst. However, for some odd reason I decided to change my mind and go with her.

And boy, I did not regret it! Because- call it destiny!- Oscar Isaac was in it! And whereas he looked a disheveled kinda sexy in Inside Llewyn Davis, he now looked drop dead gorgeous, I-need-a-towel-to-mop-up-my-own-drool-because-he-is-so-hot kinda sexy.

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I mean, Oh my.

So after that, I was a fan.

And then, again one day later, I was flipping channels out of boredom and stumbled upon the film Body of Lies from 2008. Although it’s a rather old movie, I hadn’t seen it yet and … guess what?… Oscar Isaac is in it as well!! Admittedly, he dies after 20 minutes, but hey, in those short scenes in which he was alive and kicking he looked really handsome!

So now I am going berserk over Oscar Isaac. He is my new Hollywood chouchou. I hope you will all forgive me this latest outburst of Hollywood insanity. I just can’t help it.

And just so you know, Oscar Isaac will be starring in the film A Most Violent Year – together with none other than Jessica Chastain!- which will come out in theaters this fall , and in Star Wars (!!!)

Yes, I definitely have something to look forward to!

Long live Hollywood Hotness!

And long live Oscar Isaac!

These Are A Few of My Favourite Things: Ed Sheeran’s Multiply, Lupita’s Face and Chaotic Lingerie Sales

Published June 26, 2014 by The Feminist

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“Some things are better left unsaid.” It’s a phrase that is often used by wannabe philosophers, big-headed people managers and women obsessed with Adele songs. And although there is some truth to be found in this statement – hell, I definitely don’t want to get in a fight with Adele fans! – I honestly believe that in most cases, the entire notion of keeping quiet is utter bullshit.

Why would you ever want to keep quiet, when you have so many brilliant things to say? Right?

Right???

So in order to illustrate how therapeutic it can be to say what is on your mind, here is a list of my favourite things that happened this week!

 

1)      Ed Sheeran’s X

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I know I have said this plenty of times before, and I will keep repeating myself until everyone on this earth agrees with me, but I simply adore Ed Sheeran. He is the Man. He is my Man. And unless you’re an emotionless, grumpy guttersnipe, I really don’t understand why you wouldn’t want Ed to become your Man as well. His new album X, as in multiply, came out this week and it is –surprise!- a piece of heartfelt, genuine, musical poetry. He is able to multiply styles, genres and melodies like a true musical Einstein and shifts from acoustic ballads, to rhythmic, rocky tunes to edgy British rap. No matter what genre it is, each song sounds like a personal page from his own diary and I’m sure every listener will find a personal favourite among his wide variety of emotional songs. My personal favourites are I’m a Mess (Go figure, me too!), One (tissue!), Thinking Out Loud (more tissues!) and Take it Back (Singalong!)

Take it from me, this album will simply sweep you off your feet. In short, X does not just stand for Multiply, it also stands for Ed’s X factor.

 

2)      Lupita for Lancome

Lupita

As you may already have heard, Lupita Nyong’o (yes, probably the most gorgeous woman on the planet) was named the new face of Lancome a couple of months ago, and now (finally!) the first picture of the campaign has arrived.

Be still my beating heart!

Needless to say, Lupita looks as flawless as can be. Even Beyoncé – the Queen of Flawlessness-  suddenly seems a wilted flower compared to Lupita’s beautiful face. Lupita personally shared the image on her Instagram page and called it “ the secret I never intended to keep”, since the images for the campaign were originally to become public as late as September. So thank God for Lupita.

Thank God for Lupita!

3)      Lingerie. What else?

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You might have been wondering why I have been such an irregular blogger all of a sudden. Well, let me tell you a little secret: I am no longer part of the “young crowd”. I am no longer a university student. I am now officially a grown-up.

I have a job.

I.Have. A. Job.

A serious, adult, going-to-the-office, 9-to-5 job.

Needless to say, at first I was completely terrified (As in: “OMG, I have to pay taxes!”) and got home every night exhausted. Hence the lack of blog posts.

However, my job also has its benefits! I work for a lingerie company and today we all were invited to go to the company’s enormous lingerie sale. There was chaos everywhere: women throwing around bras and taking off their trousers in the middle of the hall, but it was by far the most awesome event of the week. I was so high on adrenaline, I thought I was going to bite someone! (Now  I know what that guy Suarez must have felt like…) I ended up buying two amazing lingerie sets, which are ridiculously expensive in store, but was able to buy for next to nothing! To avoid envious looks, I will not tell how much they actually cost or how much I paid for them, but let me just say this: Working for a lingerie company definitely has its perks!

PS: Is it weird to post pics of my newly bought lingerie, dear readers? I sincerely hope not. But if so, too bad, because with brilliant bras comes brilliant bragging!

Cannes Closure: Red Carpet Recap

Published May 25, 2014 by The Feminist

Yes, this is yet another Cannes post, but don’t worry,  it is the final one.

After eleven days of glitz and glamour at the Côte d’Azur, it is time to roll up the red carpet and look back on a fabulous edition of the Cannes Film Festival. Top honors went to Winter Sleep by Turkish director Nuri Bilge Ceylan, but I myself would like to take this opportunity to hand out my very own fashion Palm D’Ors to those celebrities who really took glamour to a whole other level.

YES THEY CANNES:

Sonam Kapoor

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If I had the money to buy a dress like that, I would wear it every single day. Like, non-stop. It would make ordinary stuff – e.g.  buying tampons at the drug store- much more glamorous. Seriously. This Elie Saab gown is making my fashion-beating heart go into overdrive.

Lara Stone

cannes lara

I hereby give my body (in particular, my brain) to science, because surely there must be some biological explanation why I always fall for hot pink dresses. (I probably have some sort of gene mutation that makes me particularly susceptible to all rosy things) Whatever it is, Lara Stone’s dress is gorgeous!

Jessica Chastain

cannes jessica

Descended from Mount Olympus, I present to you: Jessica Chastain! I’m so glad she dedicated some of her time to mingle with us mortals so we could get a glimpse of her sheer flawlessness…

Freida Pinto

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"The Homesman" Premiere - The 67th Annual Cannes Film Festival

I think the word you’re looking for is KA-POW! This Oscar de la Renta dress breathes drama and stylish bombasticism (And I mean that in a good way)

Léa Seydoux

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This luxurious emerald green Prada dress is simply exquisite. (Also, I find it utterly disorienting how much sex appeal Léa can exude just be staring into the camera. )

Uma Thurman

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In true Kill Bill style (and Kill Bill yellow), Uma took out the competition with this stunning, flowy gown.

Marion Cotillard

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This short and funky Maison Margiella dress is made out of hundreds of small objects that the designers picked up on flea markets in Paris and Brussels, and it allegedly took the team 67 hours to sew everything on the dress. One word: RESPECT!

Unfortunately, there were also pretty disastrous dresses at the red carpet…

NO THEY CANNED

Irina Shayk

cannes irina

cannes irina back

I’m all for using bright colours and bold silhouettes but this sh** is just too crazy, even for me. And when I say crazy, I do mean CA-razy! That hideous electric-mustard colour (I didn’t even know such a colour existed!), that failed Madonna-eighties-revival pointed bra (why do some still think that is stylish?) and don’t get me started on the wannabe “Can’t get you out of my head” Kylie look.

On the upside: at least from the back the hood in combination with the bare back looks stunning (that is if you are able to trigger acute colourblindness)

Frederique Bel

cannes frederique

If they ever were to turn Game of Thrones into a nineties inspired porn film, she would be in it. And I do not mean that as a compliment.

Eva Longoria

"Foxcatcher" Premiere - The 67th Annual Cannes Film Festival

I honestly don’t know where to start with this one. First of all, the colour. It looks like a 1940s granny pantyhose. Secondly, the shape. It’s like an oversized thermal underwear kinda thingy. Thirdly, the turtleneck. Yikes! And finally, the peek-a-boo breast slit. Sure, a little bit of skin is sexy but the way the fabric is just all ruffled together in the corner with some sort of silver pin(??) more resembles “DIY diaper” than “femme fatale”.

Jullianne Moore

cannes julianne

Let’s start with something positive: I love the leather burgundy red top. Now on to the negative: everything else.

Sharon Stone

cannes sharon

Dear Sharon, this is a red carpet event, not a gathering for Harley Davidson enthusiasts. That dress is too short, too sleazy and shoelaces should never ever serve as a trashy form of breast imprisonment. Oh yeah, and lose the aviators.

 

Blake Lively, Queen of Cannes: But Why Was She Even There?

Published May 21, 2014 by The Feminist

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In exactly four more days, the greatest film fest of France will be over. Looking back on the past couple of days, Cannes truly has embraced its French Riviera finesse and extravagance with movie stars from all over the world graciously strolling across the red carpet.

As always, there was one star who was able to shine a little bit brighter than all the rest, and that star was Blake Lively. Not only did she show up to more than just one event and wore more than just one fabulous gown, she simply blew away the competition with her ever-present grace, charm and overwhelming beauty.

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But… what was she actually doing there? The last time she appeared on TV or in cinema was in 2012 with Gossip Girl and the Savages. Sure, Gossip Girl was a tremendously popular show, but even the best shows have an expiration date. Moreover, her next film will be released in 2015, which isn’t exactly just around the corner.

So the question remains: what the hell was she doing there in the first place?

Time for some gossip!

Possibility nr. 1: She may be working on a very secretive project.

We all know that one year of absence on screen is like a lifetime of absence in Hollywood. So who knows, Blake might be releasing some brand new project in the very near future and is strategically trying to create some momentum around her personality. In that case, looking stunning on a red carpet is definitely the way to go.

Possibility nr. 2: She is there as L’Oreal Paris ambassador.

L’Oreal is big in Cannes, so obviously the brand needed to get some famous divas on the attendee list in order to promote their products.

Although a very good marketing trick, I do not think any woman will fall for that. Unfortunately, no matter how much L’Oreal make up we would put on our faces, we will never ever ever look like Blake. *letting out a soft sob*

Possibility nr. 3: Ryan Reynolds needs a distraction

One of the most plausible explanations for Blake’s presence could be because her hubby Ryan Reynolds is there to promote his film the Captive. Now, as a devoted wife and fashion-diva you simply cannot pass on a trip to Cannes. Flaunting beautiful designer dresses and that great body on La Croisette is something we all want to do, right?

However, Blake Lively’s presence might also be to his advantage, because his film got completely bashed in the press. So in order to shift the attention away from the bad reviews (in this case, “bad” is a euphemism for “I would rather be disemboweled with a clothes hanger than watch that movie again”) he simply had to have Blake by his side to overwhelm the press with her fabulous femme fatale-ness.

Here is what they might have been saying:

"The Captive" Premiere - The 67th Annual Cannes Film Festival

Ryan: “Oh God, this is so embarrassing.  I wanna go home and order pizza.”

Blake: “Just keep smiling, dear. The press loves us. We’re wearing matching outfits!”

FRANCE-ENTERTAINMENT-CANNES-FILM-FESTIVAL

Ryan: “ I think that photographer just winked at you.”

Blake: “Why, at me? How charming! Shall I strike a pose. Blow him a kiss, maybe?”

Possibility nr. 4: It’s not Blake, it’s her clone.

Okay, so maybe I have been watching to many episodes of Orphan Black, but just think about it! What if the real Blake is locked up in a room in LA somewhere, while her evil clone is pretending to be her, just so she can wear all the fabulous clothes and sleep with Ryan Reynolds. (Don’t frown, ladies. We would all do the same if we had the chance. 😉 )

So yes, Black Lively was indeed the Queen of Cannes, but why she was actually there, no one really knows.

Obviously, I’m leaning towards option four.