Last night was the night we had all been waiting for: The Oscars!
It was a splendid show, not only because Neil Patrick Harris showed up in his underwear (yassss)
or Eddie Redmayne won (he won!),
but especially because the marvelous Patricia Arquette had the guts to stand up and demand equal pay for women in the industry. Her speech gave me goosebumps and looking at how Meryl and J.LO reacted, I’m guessing it gave them goosebumps too…
Anyway, what a wonderful night it was indeed!
So back to the dresses, because there is plenty to be said about last night’s parade. First of all, I often do NOT agree with the general opinion of all the other fashion bloggers. Why does everyone hate ScarJo’s necklace? Seriously, I luuuuuuv it. Why did they despise Gwyneth’s giant shoulder flower so much? I thought it looked amazing! And yes, maybe Lady Gaga’s gloves were a bit weird, but for heaven’s sake, it’s Lady Gaga we’re talking about!
So here is my very own red carpet report. Take it or leave it.
Just really really pretty…
You can always count on Kerry Washington to bring some elegance to the party.
This Miu Miu gown with peplum may not be as bold as some of the other looks, but it definitely is really really pretty.
I’ve never been that much of a Jennifer Aniston fan. Not when it comes to her acting, and definitely not when it comes to her wardrobe choices, but damn, even I have to admit that that is one hell of a nice dress!
I’m a huge sucker for black and white colour-blocking myself, so Reese Witherspoon’s Tom ford ticks all the boxes in my opinion.
Jennifer Lopez often has the tendency to show off too much of her curves… and although you really can’t miss her very present plunging cleavage, the combination with the nude tones, the transparency and the embellishments makes the entire look much more refined and classy.
I love the colour of Chrissy Teigen Zuhair Murad’s gown. But if there is anything I am truly thrilled about it’s her dark lipstick. Absolutely gorgeous!
Oprah Winfrey demonstrated that you don’t need a size zero to look stunning on a red carpet. This nude toned Vera Wang is sheer perfection.
Did Dakota Johnson take another trip to the Red Room of Pain to find inspiration for the colour of her dress? Whatever she did, it paid off, because this red gown with a bold cut is just every fashionista’s dream!
The boldly beautiful
I have no idea why so many hated the necklace. Scarlet Johansson is making me green with envy over her stunning jewel! (pun fully intended)
Kudos to Rosamund Pike! Her intricate, corset-like, Givenchy dress is seemed to the brim with roses. It’s bold. It’s beautiful. It’s exactly what an Oscar dress should look like!
Emma Stone wearing Elie Saab. Things really cannot get any better than that.
Although the slightly greenish gold is a difficult colour to pull off, Emma does it so well. Sigh.
Jennifer Hudson’s classic silhouette becomes stunning in this bold mellow-yellow hue.
The beautifully bold
Lady Gaga wore hands down one of the most interesting dresses. She looks totally otherworldly in this structural Azzedine Alaïa dress!
And my guess is that, given the dish-washing gloves, she might as well be hiding a detergent spray underneath her skirt. To get rid of all those hateful comments about her dress, I presume. Haters gonna hate, Lady Gaga, so don’t care about these conservative party-poopers!
Why everyone else was so against Gwyneth Paltrow’s flower, is beyond me. Maybe all those critics simply aren’t blessed with the gift of looking at life through rose-coloured glasses?
Anyway, I think Gwyneth’s cotton candy, regal-looking dress is awesome and all the haters could really use some fairy dust sprinkled in their asses.
The “Hmpf, you can do better”
Marion Cotillard may be wearing Dior, but it more looks like she took down her own shower curtain, perforated it with the perforator on her desk and if that wasn’t enough, decided to create a pouch at the height of her beautiful derriere with what seems to be scotch tape.
Summarized: not the most flattering silhouette, Marion!
If I were still a Disney-loving six-year old, I would have adored Felicity Jones’ Cinderella gown. But I’m not six anymore. My princess-aspiring days are over (well sort of anyway), and even though I love the top part of the dress with the embellished high neck, the bottom part is just too bombastic and tent-like to be considered pretty in this age of realistic simplicity.
Admittedly, Lupita has set an insanely high bar for herself on the red carpet, for she has always looked like a true goddess in all of her previous gowns. Although she still looks pretty god-like, I’m not very fond of her pearled Calvin Klein dress.
For a dress that reportedly took an incredibly long time to make (with over 6000 pearls, pfew!), it seems pretty dull to me.
That gorgeous statement necklace aside, Cate Blanchett’s black gown is the perfect example of how black can often become boring.
The Men: More than Meh!
See that, ladies?
Chris Pratt wants me. So hands off!
Matt McGorry looks incredible in this very bold, yet stunning textured jacket.
Benedict Cumberbatch may not have won, but he secretly had some liquid comfort tucked away in his jacket.
Can I take a sip, Benny?
And last but not least, I would like to take a moment to ponder the weird transformation Bradley Cooper has undergone these last few months. Is it just me or did he indeed go from sun-kissed (sometimes a tad too orange) God to an eerie-looking Vampire? Not sure whether this look is for a new movie or maybe he got allergic to self-tanner, but in any case,
somebody seriously needs to give the man some vitamin pills.